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Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sat Aug 03, 2013 9:20 am
by jjwinks
Hey all,

I just finished a cartoon pilot made with Anime Studio. There's some strong language, so please be aware. I was hoping for an Adult Swim type audience :)

I hope you enjoy!



Best,

Jared

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sat Aug 03, 2013 4:59 pm
by shift
Not bad. I like it.

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sat Aug 03, 2013 6:34 pm
by jjwinks
Thanks! I appreciate that :)

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sat Aug 03, 2013 8:24 pm
by heyvern
Oh for heaven's sake... I should be shocked and appalled. I was raised by conservative mennonites (that is true, no really, my dad was a mennonite minister. I have relatives who wear head coverings and plain clothes).

However, I just couldn't stop watching. I think it's because of the huge PC overload in society today (no, my computer didn't explode). There is this new type of no holds barred all or nothing humor that I think is a response to over the top always be nice, never say anything remotely offensive, political correctness. You see this everywhere now. At first you kind of feel... shocked... but then... it's kind of a release.

I couldn't help myself but... I just like these guys for some reason. I still cringe a bit at the racist stereotypes. Is that a racist stereotype as satire or is it motivated by something more evil? I can never tell. Just in case, I turned down the volume. Is Peter making fun of Whales or alternative lifestyles or both? Of course, the real stereotype in this is just plain morons... morons come in all shapes colors and creeds.

By the way, that is EXACTLY how I was tricked into buying my house. ;)

p.s. TRUE STORY ALERT! My first neighbors were fined for keeping a pure bread wolf in the backyard. I had no clue. Animal control shows up. Lots of arguing. I thought their "dog" looked a bit... unusual. You could put THAT in the show. After that, another neighbor was cooking meth and trashed his rental house after getting out on bail. I thought they were simply doing remodeling, putting in a new bathroom or something, why else would the toilet be smashed in the front yard. I would sit on the porch with neighbors across my street and they would fill me in on the soap operas I couldn't see from my side. Another neighbor was evicted after her husband died suddenly. The house was vacant but the dog was still there for several weeks. The only thing I can figure, the lease was in the dog's name. At one point the dog (huge angry pit bull) broke through a fence and was running around in my yard. I heard the ruckus and went outside to see 2 animal control guys chasing the beast around my yard. I went back inside... slowly. :)

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sun Aug 04, 2013 5:13 am
by jjwinks
First of all, what an awesome response. :)

I really appreciate the fact that you were able to keep an open mind while watching the show. I think you may be on to something with the PC overload. You see, I'm just about the most politically correct guy you'd ever meet. I'm really sensitive and apathetic, and have worked in customer service positions and cared way too much most of my adult life. When it comes to the entertainment I choose to watch, its mostly explicit and not incredibly PC. When I create, I feel like my creative voice kinda wanders that direction as well.

As far as the racism, I want it to be satirical. I don't know if I'm quite smart enough to make that readily apparent, but I try. The fact of the matter is, when we wrote the episode, we really wanted to be offensive to absolutely everyone... not so much that we'd hurt feelings or push an audience away, but really just push the envelope (which I hope casts a mirror on it's own ridiculousness). Reactions are involuntary, so I'd never be mad at someone who found the show to be unwatchable because of is stereotypes and such, but I'd definitely prefer to really incite an emotional response and have a good conversation about it after, than be PC and too safe.

The character Peter is something that I kind of stole from the voice actor that plays him. The actor, an out gay man, is constantly battling to keep his weight down. He used to have this bit where he would liken himself to a huge whale that had no concept of how large he was, and would daintily try to keep himself cool with a tiny bottle of water. When it comes down, we're cool with alternative lifestyles, but we're not too keen on whales yet.

Your true story is absolutely awesome! Just hilarious and definitely would make for some entertaining story lines.

Anyway. Thank you for taking the time to watch the show, and for your thoughts. You had me thinking a great deal of the day.

Best,

Jared

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sun Aug 04, 2013 11:27 am
by Yosemite Sam
This was pretty damn funny. Great job guys! Saw you got LR voicing in there, lol. Keep at it!

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sun Aug 04, 2013 3:24 pm
by drumlug13
Honestly my first reaction was... oh no, not another 9+ minute video, I'll never make it through to the end ...
My second reaction was ... I really really hope they don't sign those papers. (Like Verne and the Characters I can relate to the situation.)
Third reaction was... The whale character is really funny.
Fourth reaction was ... It's over already?

It's really well put together, and the story pulled me in and kept me watching to the end. Good job !

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sun Aug 04, 2013 6:32 pm
by jjwinks
Thanks for the kind words guys :) I worked really hard on this, and it makes it worth it the you are enjoying it. LR is the man!

-Jared

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Sun Aug 11, 2013 12:33 am
by Danimal
The animation was good and the jokes stood well enough on their own to be able to avoid the "put in cursing to make it 'edgy'" trap that seems to plague shows sometimes. It's certainly one I would and will watch again when another episode rolls around.

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2013 7:44 pm
by jjwinks
Thanks Danimal, you're the best!

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Fri Aug 16, 2013 9:39 pm
by neeters_guy
It seems like a common situation comedy premise, you know, Manchildren-as-Roommates. Even the initial setup reminds of me Yosemite Sam's Buddies: Dumb guys get scammed into signing a lease. Given that most people write what they know and most single guys have lived with roommates, I guess it isn't all that surprising.

The video is funny enough and the fact you created a complete package (with Lionel voice acting even) is an accomplishment. 8) If you're going to pitch this though, the animation and character designs need a more professional touch.

As an aside, I would still like to see something more original than a couple guys and a couch. :)

Re: Adult Swim Type Cartoon Pilot

Posted: Wed Aug 21, 2013 1:15 pm
by Kosafwc
So check out my Viropolis cartoon, you have a bunch of germs sitting in a car there :D

I like what I see. It's quite long but there is a rythm in it. Thanks to that one can easly fall into the plot and watch all of it without being bored. Good Job, I'm waiting for more!