The trailer of my first animation short film!
It's made ALL with ASP 5 and rendered with ASP7.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17djgsSVJO4
My Trailer
Moderators: Víctor Paredes, Belgarath, slowtiger
My Trailer
Voilà!
The trailer of my first animation short film!
It's made ALL with ASP 5 and rendered with ASP7.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17djgsSVJO4
The trailer of my first animation short film!
It's made ALL with ASP 5 and rendered with ASP7.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17djgsSVJO4
Sorry for my bad english... Q_Q
Yes, I watched it before you posted it here.
I like the character designs and music, good job!
I can only comment on a few things.
The scene where the blue water and pink sky meet looks a little flat, kind of like a wall would look like. Maybe have the horizon a bit blurry.
The other is when the guy walks on the plateau through the clouds, his feet are slipping. I have really struggled with this myself on my characters.
Stephen
I like the character designs and music, good job!
I can only comment on a few things.
The scene where the blue water and pink sky meet looks a little flat, kind of like a wall would look like. Maybe have the horizon a bit blurry.
The other is when the guy walks on the plateau through the clouds, his feet are slipping. I have really struggled with this myself on my characters.
Stephen
Nice one! It creates a strong mood and makes me curious about the plot. And the pink scene with the clouds looks great. The character expressions in that scene are very convincing.
Be careful on the head turns, though. When you show the character in side view, the head doesn't look right when it turns 90 degrees to face the camera.
I find that turning my head like that is uncomfortable and I won't do it unless I have to see something behind me. If I do turn that far, I'm sure my face and neck will look strained and the chin should still be forward of the shoulder. But If the character is just thinking to himself, a 3/4 view would look more natural.
I look forward to seeing more! :D
Be careful on the head turns, though. When you show the character in side view, the head doesn't look right when it turns 90 degrees to face the camera.
I find that turning my head like that is uncomfortable and I won't do it unless I have to see something behind me. If I do turn that far, I'm sure my face and neck will look strained and the chin should still be forward of the shoulder. But If the character is just thinking to himself, a 3/4 view would look more natural.
I look forward to seeing more! :D
Yes, I know all about the head turn. 
But I started them on ASP 5 one year ago and completed them on ASD 6 and when I bought ASP7 the project was too advanced to re-made it.
But next project will use blend morphs for the head turn (I developed the perfect tecnique for my chars!).
Now I'm searching for the voice actors to made the main project.
Stay tuned!
But I started them on ASP 5 one year ago and completed them on ASD 6 and when I bought ASP7 the project was too advanced to re-made it.
But next project will use blend morphs for the head turn (I developed the perfect tecnique for my chars!).
Now I'm searching for the voice actors to made the main project.
Stay tuned!
Sorry for my bad english... Q_Q
It's difficult to give feedback, because so little is happening. Usually a "trailer" gives you some idea of the story, introduces one or more characters in some action, lets you see a little of the personality of the hero and what he or she is up against, and so on. This is some haunting music, a few captions, and 3 or 4 people who aren't doing very much. What's the story?
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
Yes, you're right... Maybe the "trailer" definiton is a bit wrong. 
How can I define it?
My intention was to "allure" people.
About the story... It is a bit elaborate, the final result can reach the half-hour of duration...
It's a story about the netherworld, a mix of real reference to Holy Bible, the Dante's 'Divina Commedia' and a bit of my creativity.
Basically it will be a mix of comic and earnest situations.
I hope the mix will work.
How can I define it?My intention was to "allure" people.
About the story... It is a bit elaborate, the final result can reach the half-hour of duration...
It's a story about the netherworld, a mix of real reference to Holy Bible, the Dante's 'Divina Commedia' and a bit of my creativity.
Basically it will be a mix of comic and earnest situations.
I hope the mix will work.
Sorry for my bad english... Q_Q
It seems too slow tempo.
Not alluring so much as boring. No real action, but a lot of standing around.
Without dialogue, 3 minutes is too long.
The settings and background are too vague to give an impression of the netherworld, and the characters too static to give any impression of comic or earnest situations.
The music is lovely, but again, too slow tempo. I thought the last character was falling asleep near the end, and thought it too appropos.
It needs more dynamism. (Just my opinion).
The animation was VERY smooth, just not very lively.
Not alluring so much as boring. No real action, but a lot of standing around.
Without dialogue, 3 minutes is too long.
The settings and background are too vague to give an impression of the netherworld, and the characters too static to give any impression of comic or earnest situations.
The music is lovely, but again, too slow tempo. I thought the last character was falling asleep near the end, and thought it too appropos.
It needs more dynamism. (Just my opinion).
The animation was VERY smooth, just not very lively.
~M
Change is inevitable, growth is optional.
Life is short, enjoy the adventure!
Change is inevitable, growth is optional.
Life is short, enjoy the adventure!
OK -- could be interesting. Pick out one or two action sequences that help to tell the story, and use them. Trailers aren't alluring if nothing is happening.Imago wrote:It's a story about the netherworld, a mix of real reference to Holy Bible, the Dante's 'Divina Commedia' and a bit of my creativity.
Basically it will be a mix of comic and earnest situations.
I hope the mix will work.
You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
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smileypete
- Posts: 31
- Joined: Sun Jun 07, 2009 3:37 pm
Here's something constructive.
The best piece of animation you had in that sequence was from 2:35 to when the credits roll. The character looking up whilst panning up over clouds rolling past works really nicely and portrays a good amount of emotion.
Around this kind of emotion you can build a stories, but that will take more work.
Good work
pete
The best piece of animation you had in that sequence was from 2:35 to when the credits roll. The character looking up whilst panning up over clouds rolling past works really nicely and portrays a good amount of emotion.
Around this kind of emotion you can build a stories, but that will take more work.
Good work
pete